


heart is hard to translate

by bentleys



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-25
Updated: 2012-11-25
Packaged: 2017-11-19 11:11:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/572629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bentleys/pseuds/bentleys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When she first saw her face, Anna never imagined that Ruby could be beautiful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	heart is hard to translate

**Author's Note:**

> content warnings:  
> This fic deals with Ruby's "true form"/demonic face, so warnings for body horror/violence.

When she first saw her face, Anna never imagined that Ruby could be beautiful.

Ruby was only the second demon Anna had ever seen, and she’d been too terrified by the swirl of red and hate that was Ruby to look very deeply. She’d screamed as Ruby had dragged her out of the closet ‘till Ruby had clamped a hand over her mouth, and then she had forced herself to become calm, to breathe. Ruby had taken her out, and away, to a run-down house in the middle of nowhere. Ruby had said it’s the safest they can get right now. Now that they’re here, Ruby’s watching something, some demon scrying thing, and Anna finally has the chance to really study her.

She can’t say she’s expecting what she sees. Ruby is a demon, yes. It’s obvious at first glance, face and body and soul all a twisted mess.

But if you look hard enough you can see the remnants of her humanity, the woman she once was. Ruby was human and now is something else, and Anna sometimes almost feels as if she started off something else and became human. It’s not that she has illusions of grandeur or something; it’s just that she _remembers._ She remembers being something higher, a feeling of brightness and floating and incredible, incredible, beauty. But whatever it was, she’s lost it. Anna is shoved into this shell, and Ruby has had her humanity torn from her like the skin off her bones. But while the flesh may have been devoured, blood’s still pumping in Ruby’s veins, and Anna can see something in it other than sin, now that she looks.

If Ruby’s gone up and she’s gone down, Anna thinks then maybe they’ll meet in the middle. Regardless, she doesn’t flinch anymore when she looks at Ruby; she can find the beauty in the writhing scars and burning flesh. It’s a tragic kind of beauty, but Anna’s always been able to appreciate that—because she’s religious, maybe. There’s a lot of tragedies in the Bible, but she’s always thought that some of them were kind of gorgeous, in a broken sort of way. Despite everything, Ruby saved her life and for some unknowable reason, Anna trusts her.

Ruby glances over her shoulder at Anna, as if to check she’s still alive, still there. Anna catches her eye and holds it. She doesn’t jerk away, doesn’t even want to. She gives Ruby a swift smile. She thinks that maybe they can learn from each other.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written as part of [SPN Femslash Week 2011](http://spnfemslash.tumblr.com). I actually won joint first place in the drabble contest, somehow. I wasn't going to post it due to how short it is, but I wanted it archived somewhere other than my tumblr.


End file.
